Being Steadfast.

"Thank you for your kindness, thank you for your mercy, thank you for your gentleness. You're so patient with me" Work project today..... Pick up trash around the perimeter of Walmart then push carts.I secretly kind of enjoyed it - I got to be alone and pray all day. It's been a pretty good day. I got a nice tan and a good workout. While praying, I was just throwing out a lot of frustration at the Lord. I've recently found myself in this place of thinking that maybe, just maybe I'm not cut out for this life the Lord has called me into. I haven't felt that I've given enough to Him for Him to provide for me. I mean, why would the Lord grant me $7000 while everyday I slap Him in the face? Maybe I messed up too many times and the Lord is giving my task to someone else, someone that can handle it more efficiently. I was acting childish, I was frustrated with myself so much that I wasn't satisfied with the thought that I could still be rewarded the opportunity to serve the Lord in a foreign nation. After much prayer to the Lord, everything in me was quieted - an experience I can't explain any other way. I felt as if the Lord wanted me to know that He still has this for me. There is NOTHING in this world that He CAN'T overcome. He asked me if I still trusted that he will provide for me. Of course I said yes. But he wanted me to go deeper, He asked for me to put EVERYTHING aside and just let Him do it. He is working on gaining my trust, that I would trust that He will provide even in the dry season. I am still going through a season of refining and refreshing and in this season, He wants us to know that He is the One who will provide; that He is the One that will "shepherd [us] and lead [us] to living fountains of waters. And will wipe away EVERY tear from [our] eyes" (Revelation 7:17) Going through Peter's epistles has brought light into a lot of darkness in my life. 2 Peter 3: 17-18 says, "You therefore, beloved, since you know this beforehand, beware lest you also fall from your own steadfastness, being led away with the error of the wicked, but grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. To Him be the glory both now and forever. Amen." What I want, and what I know the Lord wants out of me is to do just that, "grow in the grace and knowledge of Him." I am willing to lay everything aside and follow Him. I trust that if His desire is for me to go into the darkest nations and let His people know who He is, then He will perfectly provide the way for me to do so. Sure, I will have to work hard still, and I can't just sit around expecting it all to come to me. This life I want to live is going to be hard (but the end result will be worth it!). Things cant just happen as soon as we want them to all the time. If it worked that way, we wouldn't necessarily need to put our faith in Jesus. I have a little more than a month until I begin ACTS and right now, I am satisfied in knowing that the Lord is going to bring in everything I need to do this. I'm giving it to Him. That's really all we can do right? 

Representation of Christ

1 Peter 1: 13-15 "Therefore gird up the loins of your mind, be sober, and rest your hope FULLY upon the GRACE that is brought to you at the revelation of Jesus Christ; as obedient children, not conforming yourselves to the former lusts, as in your ignorance; but as He who called you is holy, you also be holy in ALL you conduct."

          Working at Walmart has recently been giving me much opportunity to observe the many people I encounter on a daily basis. This biggest thing that bothered me today is the fact that we separate ourselves into our own made up "groups". For example, one who has money automatically becomes better than one that doesn't, or they even see themselves as a much higher priority than myself. In some ways, I can understand (having a higher education, having to work hard for the successful position you are in, etc.). But, does/should this get in the way of our ministry? So many "worlds" the human race separates itself into. It breaks my heart to remember that Jesus died so that one day ALL people will confess He is the only TRUE and LIVING Lord. It breaks my heart because the closer He and I get in our friendship, the more I can feel His heart. None of us should be in a position to judge. Watching protests against a bill being signed for an equal rights marriage and seeing people at Planned Parenthood be just plain nasty because people have opposing beliefs. In my own opinion, this will not and cannot change any non-believer's opinions. We cannot throw out harsh judgement when we have our own sins we deal with on a daily basis. I think the girl who has an abortion will respond to someone who listens, someone that is loving, someone who puts on Christ and cries with her and communicates with her without a convicting tone. We all deserve a second chance, correct? Granted, there is repentance needing brought forth, but isn't there something we ALL have or have to repent of? What we need to do in these times of pressing, in these last days, is unite together and begin to act as the Bride of Christ. Our point of existence isn't merely the fact of bringing people to Christ, it's loving Him and befriending Him to the point that you desire NOTHING else. In this place, you will begin to be the representation of Christ that attracts our lost brothers and sisters to Jesus. KNOW HIM! simply Him and only Him! He is all it takes; He is all you need; He is the ONLY One that can and and will bring people to Him.

Father, I am sorry for any wrong I have brought to any person. I pray for those struggling trying to find who they are, who they are in You. Jesus, I am sorry that we daily take for granted the death you died on the cross. Bring you children to you. Jesus I ask that you come. Fall on your people. Use me more and more to help others understand you. My hope and desire is to become a representation of who You are. Jesus you purchased me when I was impure; you bought me in your complete purity. You washed me clean and set me free, free to worship you, bow at your feet, and give you my EVERYTHING. I humbly give you me! Right now I ask that the way people present themselves in a daily mannor becomes a reflection of who you are. Be with your broken ones and be their comfort. I love you Jesus, In your name, amen.