Adoption as sons of the Most High King

The past few months the Lord has constantly been bringing me back to Ephesians. The book is so rich in teaching that at times it is overwhelming to even begin to dig into. However, while I was working a week or two ago, repeating over and over in my head was Eph. 1:3-5. Specifically:

"adoption as sons". 

Growing up, I never really received the attention and even love from my earthly father to help me understand God as a Father. For years, even hearing such a thing as "God being my Father" just made me angry. I felt that it would never make sense to me and that I would never have the understanding of this concept.

A short background of my life: I grew up most of my life with my dad not in the picture. At times, here and there, he would try, but brought constant disappointment.

I feel that we could all relate with having constant disappointment come up in our lives. Whether from our parents, siblings, mentors, or whomever. Living in a fallen world, there is bound to be things that will always let us down. We are humans that haven't fully received our inheritance. 

The Lord told me to go back and look at each major disappointment from my past and to wait for Him to reveal to me where He was in the midst of it all. As I did, most of the major disappointments came up from my relationship between my dad and I. But then, I realized that in most of these, my step-dad stood up and tried his hardest to turn my disappointment into feeling supported. Yeah, he is human and we have had our rough times, but, as a whole he has been so kind by taking me in as his own and treating me as a father should treat his son. 

I've been looking for a car the past few months as my car completely gave up on me. Not feeling like I was getting anywhere, my step-dad and I were able to connect on trying to get the best car for me. As he has seen how much I have been hurt by constant lies and broken promises, he has worked his hardest to support me and help me out. I finally get what it looks like to be loved and supported by a father. 

As I look back toward my relationship with my step-dad I notice that he has adopted my sisters and I into his family as his own son and daughters. Overwhelmed by a multitude of emotions about how loved I am by my step-dad and my mom, the Lord continues to simply whisper in my ear "I love you even more! You have been adopted by ME! You are my son and you will NOT be disappointed in Me!" 

Man! -

"...having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will." 

Seeing firsthand, adoption (whether legally or not) into a new family, I can now start to dig into this reality. Of course, we will have barriers in our path that the enemy will try to take us away from running into the righteous, eternal family. But, with a Father like the Lord, if we look to Him, He will keep us from danger. He will do WHATEVER it takes to keep us from getting hurt -physically AND emotionally! He guides us with His shepherd staff (Psalm 23).

He is a good Father and He LOVES us! 

Sitting. Waiting. Listening.

At the beginning of this year I told the Lord that all I really wanted by December was to look back and be able to say that I fell more in love with the Lord. With this in mind, I felt that I was going to jump right into continuing with ACTS (the program I just got done with). In my thoughts, I was going to do 3 more months of training (Advanced Track) and I planned on going back to the Middle East by the end of June.

As I was praying about the finances to come in for me to be able to continue, I asked the Lord that nobody would give the money if I wasn't supposed to do the Advanced Track yet.

So as you may assume, the money didn't come in. Nothing came. I mean, I got some money, but it was given to me personally, not through the program.

After this happened, I began planning for myself what was next. With a House of Prayer being pioneered in Pasadena focused on Ekballo ("send forth laborers"), I thought that maybe the Lord wanted me there. So I began running with that thought in mind.

The past couple of weeks, however, I have had time to pray and retreat with the Lord. In this time, I feel the Lord calling me into a season to just grow in deeper revelation of who He is. The 2 years I had thought I would be overseas is now looking like I will be spending stateside. I feel that He is giving me time to gain community and grow as an intercessor and as a worship leader.

With that being said, to be able to do this, I can really be anywhere. The more I pray about Pasadena, the less peace I feel that it is where I am supposed to be.

So, as of now I plan on getting a job and being more connected/involved in the church I have been attending. I will continue posting as the Lord leads me to. And I do plan on continuing with ACTS; I just feel that the timing is just not now.

Living for the Lord...

[I’ve been clothed in white,

I’m Your precious bride. 

And I will live with You my Lord!]

What if I told you that even from the beginning of creation God desired to commune with man? What if I told you that His story has always been that of love and marriage? What if I told you the book of Hosea is just a glimpse of what Jesus began the day at Calvary? What if I told you that there has been a proposal for marriage and you are part of the Bride; you are invited to the wedding feast!

While I was on outreach to the Middle East, I found myself one evening talking with a family smoking hookah in a Bedouin camp. They told me they were believers. 

Before introducing myself to them, I had this strong urge from the Lord the whole night leading up to meeting them; I felt that He wanted to express His love to them. 

When they told me they were believers, it made it much easier for me to talk with them. However, my heart began mourning with the response I received after talking with them about the Bridegroom paradigm. 

The oldest sister from the family was the only one really talking to me and she told me that I think too much and that there are aspects of the Lord that we just shouldn’t even try to understand; that He wants us to have a good time on earth and not to get caught up in the realms of figuring out more of who He actually is. I told her I disagreed with her and that over and over again, we see in scripture that the 

Lord constantly pursues and searches for a people that are wholly in love with Him. 

Before leaving, I challenged them - specifically her - to seek Him out for themselves, to ask Him to reveal Himself in a greater measure. 

Sadly, as I was telling a friend yesterday about this account, I was brought to the realization that there are many people who claim to believe and know Christ but they are so caught up in worldly success/things, they have no true desire to seek Him out.

First and foremost, I believe the most important thing that is sealed on Jesus’ heart for His beloved bride is that we simply sit before His throne and give ourselves in worship to Him. 

There are two passages that I have been soaking in while trying to understand this concept - John 17:20-26 and Luke 9:38-42. 

While digging into this, I have been convicted of the position of my heart. In a quiet time the other day, I heard the Lord softly say to me, 

“Are you focused on advancing My Kingdom, our advancing in My Kingdom?” 

After hearing this, I began to think I was slowly moving into a position where I was no better than the family I spoke to in the Middle East. They were just living their life how they wanted, and in a way I have been too - I have been like Martha in Luke 9. 

“But Martha was distracted with much serving, and she approached Him and said, 'Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to serve alone? Therefore tell her to help me.' ” 

I have - in a way - been caught up in advancing rather than caught up in His mercy. I so often act like Martha, doing things almost to impress Jesus. I think for me, I do this thinking it will advance my position in the Kingdom. However, Jesus is just looking for His friends, He is looking for His Bride! 

He is looking for ones like Mary, who will waste their life and pour their heart on Him. HE WANTS FRIENDS! Being an American, I have had in my mind that we constantly have to be striving to reach the top of the ladder. That success and happiness are found in our placement in our job, friend group, etc. 

But, I have to believe the Kindgom is much different. Our success is found in the reality of us knowing Jesus loves us, and that freedom is found in laying our lives down freely. 

So, to try to wrap this up, I see the importance of Jesus' heart is that His friends work with Him to advance His Kingdom by living a life of worship toward Him; that we begin to focus more on proclaiming His name to those who simply don't know Him, and trust that through this we begin to get closer to Him. 

The fact that He has saved us from darkness and has brought us into light should be enough to make our heart feel like it will explode! So, I challenge you to just be His friend and be excited that you will be with Him for eternity. 

Come boldly before His throne and waste your life before His feet and just love Him!

Yes, there is a truth in advancing in the Kingdom, but I have to believe that this shouldn't be the center of our life; what should be our main focus for ourselves is catching His heart for us, His bride.